Couch Potato Haiku

I just saw an episode of Queer Eye where they had the subject write a haiku for his girlfriend. Now, the show is a bit cheesy in general, but that was about as cheesy as you can get!

Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy poetry of all types including well-crafted haiku, but haiku has to be the most butchered form of poetry. It must be because the basics of haiku are so simple and pretty much anyone who knows what a syllable is, can count and can spell, is able to create haiku.

Without getting into details of the all the rules and methods for writing haiku, the simple, no frills explanation is a form of Japanese poetry consisting of three lines of 5, 7, then 5 syllables. A haiku should be simple yet be able to place an image in the readers mind using only 17 syllables. Here are a few westernized “couch potato” haikus I just came up with.

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The remote control,
Pizza, beer and spicy chips
E S P N kills

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Vacuum sits idle,
Soap opera love affair
Chocolate wrappers

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Homework is not done
Animated characters
A brick cannot fly

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